Category Archives: life

Let’s talk about men

There’s been a lot of talk about men within the past 48 hours.  On-line and off.  I have tried to get my point across and failed miserably.  I can understand why some are confused about me.  On the one hand, I readily admit that I don’t like men; yet in the same breath, I state that I get along very well with them.  How to explain this?  

Jack Nicolson was looking for a few good men. Women all over the world are joining him in that quest. How do women know when they find a member of the male species that it’s a good one?  They can’t squeeze him for ripeness; they can’t examine him (like they would apples and tomatoes) for brown spots showing signs of decay.   It seems to me that women, where it comes to men, are rather reckless.

  • Before taking a job, a candidate can research the company online or talk to past and present employees.
  • Before buying kitchen appliances, most women read the reviews.
  • Before buying clothes or shoes, the chosen item is tried on for fit and comfort.

So why are women who deal with an item they are supposed to keep for life, take a man they meet at face value?  

Some might say they don’t, that’s what dating is for, to get ‘a feel’ for the guy.  True, but not exactly accurate.  How many people – men and women alike – show their true selves while dating?  I think it’s safe to say that before going on a date, a man will shower and shave, comb his hair, and put on something nice.  In other words, he will show himself from his best side.   

If he steps over the line and swears, gets upset or worse gets a little violent, he will state that he was not himself or that ordinary he is not like that.  And women swallow it.  They are so in love that they don’t see the ‘brown spots’.  And even if they do, the sight of the flowers they get presented with, or the size of the diamond in the engagement ring will cloud their vision.   

When I say that I don’t like men, it’s because I’ve seen too many bad apples.  Hence my hesitation to ‘buy’ one.    Over the weekend I talked with Vicky (not her real name).  She got tearful when she admitted to me that she was afraid she was going to end up an old maid.  “Vicky,” I said, “the term old maid is so passé.”  “You know what I mean,” she said, “I’m afraid I won’t find anyone to grow old with, to take care of me.”  

That’s when I started to wonder … why do women get married?  Is it because of love or is it to have some company in their golden years?  Is it for financial reasons?  Is that all that men are good for?  A body to share a space with and to keep the bank account in the positive?  Is that why I steer clear of men?  Because I don’t feel the need for male company and I don’t need to be taken care of?  

Do men feel this when they are in my company? I can laugh and joke around with them.  They know that, unlike Vicky, I don’t want anything from them. I’m not going to chase them and I don’t want to be chased.  They can be themselves, without me being shocked or getting stars in my eyes. Do I get my point across? Do you get it? If you do … great; if you don’t then I guess you have to know me to understand me.

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Why shacking up before you get married is a good idea

Couples are more reluctant than ever about getting married. Whether they are crazy in love or just seem right for each other, saying those wedding vows that will bind them to each other for life is a risk fewer couples are willing to take. Couples offer the following reasons for why shacking up before you get married is a good idea.

You don’t really know someone until you live with them

Dating someone a few times a week with an occasional sleep-over may give you an idea of their personality, but it doesn’t show you what they are like on a day to day basis.

Little things make a difference

When you live with someone 24/7, you get to experience firsthand how the person handles stress, disappointment, anger, and life in general. For some those little flaws might be endearing, while for others they could become major obstacles.

Avoid taking each other for granted

Others prefer shacking up before marriage because it keeps both partners on their toes. Once married a lot of men and women feel they have it made and overnight develop a careless attitude. They relax to the point that their partner no longer recognizes the person they dated. They may quit their job, put on weight, or generally no longer take care of themselves. By living together, especially in the early stages, there is always the chance of the other calling it quits. That percentage of danger keeps the relationship fresher.

Children and family in the mix

If one or both partners have children, shacking up before you get married is certainly a good idea. The adults may love each other, but can they tolerate each other’s offspring? It worked for the Brady bunch, but it may not work for you if the kids don’t get along with each other which, in turn, puts stress on your relationship. Or the kids might like each other, but you might dislike your partners’ kids.

The same could apply to extended family members. You and your partner may get along perfectly, but inconsiderate parents and difficult siblings could sour the deal.

Sexual compatibility

You might love each other dearly, but are you sexually compatible? While you may have tested the waters already, dating sex and relationship sex are two different things. Your partner’s needs may be different from yours over the long haul or you may discover some unusual requests which you may or may not like.

Maintaining a healthy and compatible sex life over the long-term becomes a challenge for all couples. Shacking up before you get married can be a good barometer of how your sex life will mature if you remain together.

Financial compatibility

Why shacking up before you get married is a good idea also applies to whether or not the couple is financially compatible. She may love to spend money and be addicted to shoe shopping, while he may be hardcore thrifty. When you live with someone it becomes more difficult for them to hide their money habits.

Lower exit costs if the relationship fails

Probably the biggest reason why shaking up before you get married is so popular is because if the relationship doesn’t work out, no divorce is needed. With no lawyers or alimony in the mix, the couple can walk away with a clean slate without spilling as much financial or emotional blood that usually happens during a divorce.

Most people don’t buy a car without taking it for a test drive first. Before making a legal and spiritual commitment to another person, many couples today are opting to go slow and take that all-important test drive first.

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couple sitting in front of a house

Pop-up clinics for the Covid-19 vaccine

Lambs being led to the slaughter?

In order to contain the Covid-19 virus in Ontario, Canada, the government issued a number of restrictions. One of them being that social gatherings were not permitted.

“What is permitted (O. Reg. 82/20)

  • Indoor & outdoor organized events and social gatherings are not permitted, except with members of the same household.

COVID-19 Guidance: Indoor & Outdoor Events – City of Toronto

Yet look at the picture … thousands of people are gathered to receive their Covid-19 vaccine. This is just one pop-up clinic, but there are more, a lot more.

Ever since the outbreak of the pandemic, companies and organizations had to close allowing their employees to work from home. Stores had to close, restaurants and bars had to close, sports centra had to close, everything went into lockdown. As a result, numerous businesses went bankrupt or suffered major losses.

As for the general population. Some refused to go into their workplace, commanding others to pick up work-related items. Those who did occasionally go to their workplace refused to share an elevator with another person. Others, on their way to the grocery store, made a wide berth around others they encountered.

Yet suddenly everything has changed. Those who refused to go to work for fear of infection have no fear of standing in line with thousands of others to receive their vaccine. How many of them are already carriers and will infect others? Any number of them will go home, infect their spouse and children, and a number of others they will come into contact with. Those in turn will infect more people.

Those vaccinated will infect others because it has been made public that one can get infected shortly before or shortly after getting the vaccine. If infected, the person will not be aware of it because he will show no symptoms.

Despite the distribution of the various vaccines, the number of infections is going up. In Ontario, the number stubbornly remains around 4,000 per day. Belgium was down to 1,670 on April 27 but two days later is up again to 3,925.

While various vaccines are available, Canada favors the Astra Zeneca vaccine, a vaccine banned in Denmark.

Denmark becomes first country in Europe to ditch AstraZeneca vaccine | Thaiger (thethaiger.com)

How is Denmark doing? To date they only have 245,000 cases – 238,000 recovered and only 2,481 died.

How many people will die of the Covid-19 vaccine? We already know that the vaccine can cause blood clots. Just how many will develop this condition nobody knows because those numbers will not be disclosed. The authorities will want to avoid a panic.

The manufacturers of the vaccines openly state that the vaccine can cause problems, but they sush their conscience with the statement … we save more lives than what we take.

Really, and other than blood clots, what other conditions will the vaccine cause? Cancer, osteoporosis, infertility? What if a record of people suddenly find themselves unable to get pregnant? And if they do, how will babies be born normal, deformed or stillborn?

For those who die it will be said that they died of the virus, or that those people had a heart condition, had asthma, were cancer patients, or diabetics. Anything will do.

What strikes me as odd is that first it was announced that only adults could get the Covid-19 virus. Young people were safe. Then a teenager got the virus and the powers that be had to revise their statement, young people could get the virus but children under the age of 10 were safe. Now they’ve revised that statement too. Can they make up their minds?

It seems to me that they are grasping in the dark and if they are not sure about this, what else are they confused about or worse, hushing up.

What about all those people lining up for the Covid-19 vaccine? Are they lambs being led to the slaughter?

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Do You Trust the Covid-19 Vaccine

Safe or Russian roulette

Whether you’re for or against the Covid-19 vaccine, there’s no denying that one takes a risk when accepting the vaccine. The manufacturers of the vaccine acknowledge the risk but state that they are saving more lives than what they are taking.

To put the public at ease, various politicians are photographed having administered the vaccine, but are they? Who’s to say they are getting the vaccine and not a placebo? I’ve spoken to a number of people and they are worried. Not only do they worry about developing a blood clot, they worry about the long-term effects of the vaccine. Unlike the polio, measles, and chickenpox vaccine, the Covid-19 vaccine has only been around for a short time. As such, nobody knows the long-term effects.

Could those who have taken the vaccine now be at risk for diseases in six months, a year, five years? What if the vaccine increases their chances for cancer, Alzheimer’s, dementia, osteoporosis, or infertility? And if infertility is not the problem, how will future babies be born? Will they be normal or will there be some kind of defect? Nobody knows because we haven’t had a chance to find out.

As for me, I’m not having the vaccine. The Covid-19 virus has been around for over a year, I’ve been doing fine, and I have every confidence that I will continue to be fine. Quite a few people I know have been infected and recovered with minimal fuss. Those I spoke to compared their symptoms with a bad flu. They didn’t even go to the hospital, they remained in quarantine and after a week or ten days felt fine again.

My neighbor who got infected did complain though about the treatment he got. He had to wait three days before he could present himself to be tested and then had to wait another four days to get the result of the test. It’s a good thing the man had the good sense to stay at home and not have contact with his family or he could have infected a whole lot of people while waiting.

Another reason I’m not getting the vaccine is that I’m allergic to medicine in general. I can safely take Aspirin and regular Tylenol (no codeine ingredient), but that’s about it. I’ve been with my current doctor for the past twenty years and she has yet to prescribe any kind of medicine for me. If I have a cold and develop a cough, I have to resort to a syrup for a child, as adult cough mixtures contain alcohol, of which I’m also allergic. Oh and while I’m at it, I’m also allergic to caffeine.

So, where it comes to the Covid-19 vaccine I will decline. I’m not playing Russian roulette with my health.

The thing that surprises me and worries me is that despite the availability of a Covid-19 vaccine, the number of infections are not being contained. I’m following the infection rate of Ontario and Belgium and the numbers are not encouraging. In Ontario the infection rate remains over 4,000 cases daily. As for Belgium, there the infection rate seems to go up and down.

April 28 – 2,946

April 27 – 1,670

April 26 – 2,377

April 25 – 3,934

April 24 – 3,581

One theory could be that those who got vaccinated are infecting other people. After all, the Covid-19 doesn’t protect people from the virus, it merely masks the symptoms for a while. So people who are infected don’t know they are infected and spread the virus to others. In the United States people who have been vaccinated no longer have to wear a mask when venturing outside. This is in my opinion most unwise. As I said, some of those people could be infected without knowing it and infect others who in turn infect others.

In case you’re wondering why my interest in Belgium … we were supposed to vacation there in May 2020. Because of the virus, we had to cancel our trip and postpone it to May 2021. Now that May 2021 is almost here, it clear that we’ll have to postpone again.

Sometimes I wonder if things will ever go back to normal again, or if this is the beginning of the end.

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Writing Erotica

Writing erotica is unlike any other writing genre. While writers may try their hand at romance, science-fiction, or fantasy and find an audience for their work, writers really have to know what they’re doing to pull off a good erotica story.

While respected mainstream authors shy away from these types of stories, plenty of boys can’t wait to describe their wildest fantasies.

One such boy is Gary (not his real name). He announced on a popular social media site that he specializes in erotica. Really? Gary is not the most talented writer to begin with, so I wondered about his erotica work.

I hopped over to another website, looked up his name, clicked on his book, and read the preview. Five sentences into the story I was already shaking my head and I remembered my author friend’s words … ‘When done correctly writing erotica can be nice and exciting but you really have to know what you’re doing. If not, the whole story becomes laughable.’

I read the excerpt of the book to a few friends and they dissolved in peals of laughter. The whole thing was so absurd. Not just the erotica part but the whole writing style.

Curious we looked up the writer of this story and he was just what we expected … a boy, barely out of high school, overweight, spotty skin, greasy unkempt hair. In other words, a boy who finds it hard to find a girlfriend/boyfriend and as such gives way to his fantasies in stories.

When I remarked that he would do well to take a creative writing and erotica writing course, and quoted Alexander Pope who said ‘Fools rush in where angels fear to tread’, my comment was promptly deleted by the admin of the group. So much for freedom of speech and freedom of the press. Apparently Alexander Pope can make such a statement, but I cannot.

In the name of research, I looked at a few other books and noticed from the previews a distinct difference between male and female erotica writers. Female writers write with elegance and subtlety, concentrating on the forbidden, the mysterious, and the dangerous, while the male writers were much more aggressive and domineering.

While some writers, young and old, write for the sake of expressing themselves but their work never sees the light of day, others publish for all to see. Not that many do see them. These self-published works are soon swallowed up by the masses and disappear into oblivion.

My advice to anyone who wants to write erotica read at least ten books on the subject. Not self-published books, but books published by traditional publishers. Don’t just read them, study them and make notes.

If you think you have a story, before you even write or type one word remember the phrase … Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.

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All lives matter, don’t they?

Following the guilty verdict of Derek Chauvin, the blacks have taken to the streets to celebrate.

One quote read:

In a celebratory burst at a gathering of Black Lives Matter supporters in Union Square, about 500 people throughout the park shouted: “Guilty! Guilty! Guilty!” Cars honked as they passed the crowd screaming “Oh my God!” and “Black Lives Matter!”

Another read:

Asia Townsend, 58, a nurse who works at Mt. Sinai Hospital, desperately tried to find relatives on her phone to share the news.

If there had been a not guilty verdict no doubt there would have been a riot to end all riots. After all, Maxine Waters had urged them to do so.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-56810245

Is rioting in blacks’ nature? Just Google black riots and look at the pictures. Have you ever seen any other race causing such mayhem, violence, and destruction?

I knew right from the start that the verdict would have been guilty. No jury would have dared to find him not guilty.

I am not a racist, but what about white justice? How many men, women and children have died at the hands of the blacks?
How many women have been raped by blacks?
How many people have been turned into junkies or have died of an overdose of drugs provided by blacks?
Where is there justice?

Black lives matter, the blacks scream. What exactly does that mean? Does it mean that white lives don’t matter? That yellow, brown and red lives don’t matter? Do only black lives matter? Why can’t they say “All lives matter.”

When a white cop shoots a white kid, nobody cares.
When a black cop shoots a black kid, nobody cares.
When a black cop shoots a white kid, still no reaction.
But when a white cop shoots a black kid … OMG all hell breaks loose.

I am sick and tired of hearing about the poor blacks. Poor?

According to research, there are seven black billionaires in the United States, Ophray Winfrey is one of them with $2.6 billion. Michael Jordan is another with $2.1 billion   

Other blacks might not be billionaires, but there are plenty of black millionaires.

Tiger Woods             $800 million

Mariah Carey            $520 million

Shaquille O’Neal       $400 million

Beyonce                   $400 million

Denzel Washington   $255 million

Morgan Freeman       $250 million

Spike Lee                  $50 million

Barack Obama          $40 million

These are just a few black people who have done very well for themselves. Then there are those who are not exactly millionaires but still make a nice living.

Stating that black don’t have the same opportunities as white folks is a bunch of baloney. There are black lawyers, black stockbrokers, black doctors, black senators, and as we all know, even a black president. So why all the drama?

‘Power to the people’ one black woman screamed at Times Square. Make that power to the blacks.